A Canadian writer teaches English and finds out what it's like to be a foreigner.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

The Bread I Bent like a Bowstring

So I just bought a loaf of bread based purely on Engrish impulse.

Remember the peculiar Paris Baguette "Intact Toast"?

Well, this stuff has "peculiar" built into the brand.

"56h bread."

Fermentation is considered at digestion over 56 hours. It is baked thoroughly on bread with a peculiar feeling of elasticity and peculiar softness.

It's funny that the slight variance between particular and peculiar can mean the difference between "specific" and "weird."

Baker: Disaster! My bread— it's like biting into a warm drafting eraser! And I have no more budget for prototypes! We have to sell this...

PR guy: Don't worry, we'll solve this promotional quandary using... ENGLISH!!!

I'll let you know how the peanut butter sandwich turns out. I might still be chewing come tomorrow.

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